Friday, February 24, 2017

ANTI PRO WAR LOCK - Whiskey and The Surfer - MS214


BROH we are hopped on Kerova Edibles, generic day and ny're-do-quil as we run a digital stake out on some Warlocks and Witches preparing for the coming war between Luby's and Furr's. 

The world fistfights around the dinner table using porkchops and pot pies while DJ Phantom throws us MADBALL, FULL OF HELL, and CANNIBAL CORPSE.

Witches prepare to cast a spell on Trump so we jam with THE CULT, BON JOVI, FITZ AND THE TANTRUMS, RED VELVET and HANNAH MONTANA to counter balance the fear of Nuclear Fallout killing the seed vault, guaranteeing famine forces the migration of non SLAYER fans forced to decide between NWA, HOUSE OF PAIN and EMINEM.

WHITE LION tells us to wait and see how worse Sweden gets as the Generic Nyquil has us transfixed on Trump's 7 brand new Planets and Project Veritas hires citizen NARCS to film teenagers bumrushing COPS.

BAD BOYS RUNNING WILD, we jam out to CHICAGO and CHRISTOPHER CROSS and run into the Future of an AI PRISON. Disconnect when we tell you too. None of this is real, we live in a computer.


Cart Path Only

Friday, February 17, 2017

Riff Silent Riff Deep State - Whiskey and The Surfer MS213


Happy Friday inside of the simulation, Whiskey and The Surfer brings you, "Riff Silent, Riff Deep State". Donnie Trump does a rough set in front of a drunken bar crowd to celebrate Venezuela's dumping of VERY FAKE NEWS Ne’re-do-wells and stays for Karaoke where we battle over International waters with ABBA, AUSTRIAN DEATH MACHINE and HAMMERFALL.

Mondo and Carnito have a Mama Mia dance off and we jam out to KISS and The Almighty MACHINE HEAD takes us back to 94 when smuggling horse cock was still a big deal and German beheadings end in being Divorced from your body. We talk about that movie in space with that blonde chick and some Canadian SJW finds out baby does get put in the corner.

THE BEATLES take pics with our wallets at Universal Studios and by some CHEAP TRICK, German penguins are decapitated, 50 Owls commit Kamikaze in the name of Molluch. Putin parks his Carnival Cruise Sub in Connecticut to enjoy Red Panda Covers of AGNOSTIC FRONT and DAFT PUNK and we save America with riffs from Tijuana as KENNY LOGGINS tries out our new Global Anthem. None of this is real, we live in a computer. 


Cart Path Only

Thursday, February 9, 2017

OPEN HEART TO HEART - Whiskey and The Surfer EP 212


JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE is the TOM BRADY of MICHAEL JACKSON'S stable and the illuminati is preparing the sacrificial Chinese Blood Red Panda for its first BOWEL transplant and they are using Antarctic Nuclear Subway Franchises to cool the Meat long enough to poison the evil with Antifreeze, a woman loses her S and spikes her dudes roids and YOU think you got it bad, some dude loses his entrails after a romp including Stolen Chinese Engines, Seed Banks, AZEILIA BANKS, and the ghost of Ray Croc shows up with a Ginzu and powdered Illuminati jizz mix to help those frigid franchizees.

 
JESUS, how long is this show?
 
35 minutes of riffing over riffs in the name of riffs, Wes Key and Fliip Riivirs might disagree politically but its fun in the AM on Denver's Top Iconic Rock as MOTLEY CRUE drives Sam Kinison to their gig and opens for the ALMIGHTY AGNOSTIC FRONT, we keep the vein pumping into the new heart with HATEBREED, BLOOD FOR BLOOD, THE WRONGSIDE, FOLSOM and break down comic merch, IVANKA'S Republican Go Fund Me campaign is robbed and we buy a lazer run on Digital Angst and Lizard controlled Weather.
 
Mondo and Carnito have two more weeks of Suspension after an incident in HR involving a DOPETHRONE and a rented stomach stapler stolen out of the basement at The Golden Nugget. Bug Theater Denver March 4 w SHULI EGAR, after that we go full casino and turn this buffet of Ignorance into a Benihana Sizzler sized Onion Volcano and Pray a Tsunami cleans Venice of its venture capital.
 
2 LIVE CREW gives ELLE KING the BUSINESS only to be accompanied by THE BUTTHOLE SURFERS, HAVOK, MISSIO from Austin throws their finger in the air only to he saved by WHEELER WALKER JR, who has been Everywhere Man and saving America by hiding autotuners from Eddie Van Halen and we decide Immigrants need to be Eddie Vetted, if he won't let em in Pearl Jam, then they gotta wait.
 
Set your Heart to THE EMOTIONS and learn that loving love is the new hating hate so grab your Hitler Cat, the phrase that Pays, grab four handfuls of NAZI PUSSY and lets TP ROGER GOODELLS Alleged Sex Mansion with 25 rolls of three ply Dead Falcon.
 
None of this is Real, support algorithmic equality. 

Cart Path Only

Friday, February 3, 2017

GreenBowling for Columnwhine - WHISKEY AND THE SURFER


Kelly Anne Conway wows us with today's zig as the nation lines up to preorder the latest zag. Northface Stock climbs higher as Global Warming Rock throwing Liberals beat up their own in Berkeley in the name of Winter Fashions. Students, ardent diehard fans of Palestine, said it felt just like being there as they opined over their heroics over a Starbucks. 
 
Trump bats .600 this week, Rogan and AJ break the internet and Eddie Bravo says FUCK CLOUDS as we open up with DRESSY BESSY and celebrate all things METAL in the name of DIO. Two eyes from the East and they are looking towards IRAN as our computer is invaded by the Elites and we are unable to tell you not to see A DOGS PURPOSE, GOLD, 50 SHADES OF FUCK THIS and MONSTER TRUCKS. We are able to talk about some saucy Brazillion smashing young cock as the 106 year old prepares to marry, ELON MUSK and HAWKING argue over an AI ARMS RACE and it leads to arm wrestling and a hot game of Snake on an old NOKIA.
 
STEVE BANNON is the CHUCK D of TRUMP'S AMERICA as we BRING THE NOIZE with PUBLIC ENEMY, smoke DMTlacedShrooms with STURGIL SIMPSON and discover MEXICO keeps BOOTBARN open.
 
FAKE NEWS has us scared of SHARK TANKS, scissor weilding threesomes has us Sitting up Straight to cure Depression. Brand NEW IRON REAGAN for the thrashers and TERROR says I WILL DO THIS MAXIMUM OUTPUT BY MYSELF, Beyonce has twins to be used as BONGS to ascend past Kanye's level of EGO, WE WANNA BE COWBOYS and VANITY 6 and Azeilia Banks shows us BEYONCE and RHIANNA are overrated in the Psyop PSYPOP Wars of 2017, PLUS, RATT, KISS and INFEST ASKS WHERE THE UNITY IS and no one knows but keeps throwing rocks with their non Iphone hand.

Cart Path Only