Saturday, January 13, 2018

Fliip Riivers and JLJ Learn how to Cook


New year, new diet, no fucks given in the dangerzone of reality as JLJ invades the kitchen inside of the Fortress of Gratitude and we learn how to make ribs and apples for the slow cooker. Already down 4 lbs per last weigh in and so far the body is responding well to zero sugar, zero processed foods and zero flour. I feel great. 

 

Black coffee was a few day ordeal to manage but cmon, if that's the worst thing going. I'm doing pretty damn awesome. 

 

Still sober, still no prons, enjoying Father Al Lauer's daily Bread at http://www.presentationministries.com 

amazing tool for discernment and to explore your own Path of Faith as we walk each home into the light! 

 

http://www.johntole.com

 

Shows have been updated on the site and proud to announce!

Jan 23-27 Loonees Comedy Corner Colorado Springs

April 23-30 Stratosphere Hotel Las Vegas Nevada!


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Tuesday, January 9, 2018

THE RETURN! and an ANNOUNCEMENT!


Lets get real.

come join us at the Patreon at http://www.patreon.com/johntole

Bonus Episodes, Teases, Bloopers, Fan Zines and more available! 


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Friday, March 24, 2017

Digital Cannibals - Whiskey and The Surfer MS217


AI Driven Online Persona Post 1 in the New Willennium. Whiskey and The Surfer show up with Technical Difficulties and smile and dial their way through the new CA Law to Centralize Truth per The Government Guidelines and these Nere-do-well Sexist Racist Liberals are lining up to see who is gonna sell Yoga in the new FEMA Camp. 

 
Butt silicone goes wrong, Cops shoot a guy over a Caulking Gun and we talk about The Real News, The Real Fake News and The Good News as we prepare for the Final Push into Armageddon, are you physically able to outlast the first 30 days of Darkness. We jam out to 369, BRUNO MARS, MOTLEY CRUE, COLIN OF ARABIA, FLOORPUNCH, BOB SEGER, EDDIE MONEY. 
 
LEN Steals our Sunshine and CUT UP debuts a new jammer to be the cascading wave of Cardio Dreams which will save you and your loved ones. PREPARE NOW.  
http://www.whiskeyandthesurfer.com 
http:www.johntole.com 
 
All Social Media are run by AI, disconnect and try The New Experiment. 

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Friday, March 3, 2017

In The Arms of The Algorithms - Whiskey and The Surfer - MS215


Nancy Pelosi has a frown off to win her next job as The Trump Train continues to roll inside of the Digital Simulation. Whiskey and The Surfer, fresh off of Ash Wednesday, they wonder if the Adam's Family has a Tennis Coach, what is that 4 mile wide creature in the Pacific, Is Oprah training to be our next CZAR and more!
 
SIR MIXX ALOT an his posse are racing against LANA DEL RAY, FRANKLIN FUENTES and LA GUNS.  A woman kills a guy over a PotRoast, Fraternities go wild in Trump's America and we rage with WARBRINGER, SUICIDAL TENDENCIES, KILLING TIME and not before we break our single day vocal record with THE DOOBIE BROTHERS and Start an All Obama Pro Weed Michael McDonald Coverband called The Doobie Birthers. 
 
FERGILICIOUS lets us know the algorithms are flossin on Crenshaw as we spend our Lenten Season jamming out to BILLY IDOL, talking about SEX ROBOTS, Digital Orgies, LA's new TRUMP Based SATANIC Church and ACE FREHLEY asks which Side of the Coin we have to give to GENE.
 
Did I mention we were Molested by the TSA twice in two hours at LAX? Did I mention Austin TSA workers stealing guns and selling them for Weed? Did I mention some Ne're-Do-Well who wants to cut off his jack and become the boneless Alien strong enough to singlehandedly fight Trump's Wall? Did I mention humanity is Doomed and none of this is real?

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Friday, February 24, 2017

ANTI PRO WAR LOCK - Whiskey and The Surfer - MS214


BROH we are hopped on Kerova Edibles, generic day and ny're-do-quil as we run a digital stake out on some Warlocks and Witches preparing for the coming war between Luby's and Furr's. 

The world fistfights around the dinner table using porkchops and pot pies while DJ Phantom throws us MADBALL, FULL OF HELL, and CANNIBAL CORPSE.

Witches prepare to cast a spell on Trump so we jam with THE CULT, BON JOVI, FITZ AND THE TANTRUMS, RED VELVET and HANNAH MONTANA to counter balance the fear of Nuclear Fallout killing the seed vault, guaranteeing famine forces the migration of non SLAYER fans forced to decide between NWA, HOUSE OF PAIN and EMINEM.

WHITE LION tells us to wait and see how worse Sweden gets as the Generic Nyquil has us transfixed on Trump's 7 brand new Planets and Project Veritas hires citizen NARCS to film teenagers bumrushing COPS.

BAD BOYS RUNNING WILD, we jam out to CHICAGO and CHRISTOPHER CROSS and run into the Future of an AI PRISON. Disconnect when we tell you too. None of this is real, we live in a computer.


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Friday, February 17, 2017

Riff Silent Riff Deep State - Whiskey and The Surfer MS213


Happy Friday inside of the simulation, Whiskey and The Surfer brings you, "Riff Silent, Riff Deep State". Donnie Trump does a rough set in front of a drunken bar crowd to celebrate Venezuela's dumping of VERY FAKE NEWS Ne’re-do-wells and stays for Karaoke where we battle over International waters with ABBA, AUSTRIAN DEATH MACHINE and HAMMERFALL.

Mondo and Carnito have a Mama Mia dance off and we jam out to KISS and The Almighty MACHINE HEAD takes us back to 94 when smuggling horse cock was still a big deal and German beheadings end in being Divorced from your body. We talk about that movie in space with that blonde chick and some Canadian SJW finds out baby does get put in the corner.

THE BEATLES take pics with our wallets at Universal Studios and by some CHEAP TRICK, German penguins are decapitated, 50 Owls commit Kamikaze in the name of Molluch. Putin parks his Carnival Cruise Sub in Connecticut to enjoy Red Panda Covers of AGNOSTIC FRONT and DAFT PUNK and we save America with riffs from Tijuana as KENNY LOGGINS tries out our new Global Anthem. None of this is real, we live in a computer. 


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Thursday, February 9, 2017

OPEN HEART TO HEART - Whiskey and The Surfer EP 212


JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE is the TOM BRADY of MICHAEL JACKSON'S stable and the illuminati is preparing the sacrificial Chinese Blood Red Panda for its first BOWEL transplant and they are using Antarctic Nuclear Subway Franchises to cool the Meat long enough to poison the evil with Antifreeze, a woman loses her S and spikes her dudes roids and YOU think you got it bad, some dude loses his entrails after a romp including Stolen Chinese Engines, Seed Banks, AZEILIA BANKS, and the ghost of Ray Croc shows up with a Ginzu and powdered Illuminati jizz mix to help those frigid franchizees.

 
JESUS, how long is this show?
 
35 minutes of riffing over riffs in the name of riffs, Wes Key and Fliip Riivirs might disagree politically but its fun in the AM on Denver's Top Iconic Rock as MOTLEY CRUE drives Sam Kinison to their gig and opens for the ALMIGHTY AGNOSTIC FRONT, we keep the vein pumping into the new heart with HATEBREED, BLOOD FOR BLOOD, THE WRONGSIDE, FOLSOM and break down comic merch, IVANKA'S Republican Go Fund Me campaign is robbed and we buy a lazer run on Digital Angst and Lizard controlled Weather.
 
Mondo and Carnito have two more weeks of Suspension after an incident in HR involving a DOPETHRONE and a rented stomach stapler stolen out of the basement at The Golden Nugget. Bug Theater Denver March 4 w SHULI EGAR, after that we go full casino and turn this buffet of Ignorance into a Benihana Sizzler sized Onion Volcano and Pray a Tsunami cleans Venice of its venture capital.
 
2 LIVE CREW gives ELLE KING the BUSINESS only to be accompanied by THE BUTTHOLE SURFERS, HAVOK, MISSIO from Austin throws their finger in the air only to he saved by WHEELER WALKER JR, who has been Everywhere Man and saving America by hiding autotuners from Eddie Van Halen and we decide Immigrants need to be Eddie Vetted, if he won't let em in Pearl Jam, then they gotta wait.
 
Set your Heart to THE EMOTIONS and learn that loving love is the new hating hate so grab your Hitler Cat, the phrase that Pays, grab four handfuls of NAZI PUSSY and lets TP ROGER GOODELLS Alleged Sex Mansion with 25 rolls of three ply Dead Falcon.
 
None of this is Real, support algorithmic equality. 

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